She was getting good at battling a pitcher. She worked the count to three and two and then hit six straight foul balls. Rusty tried to get her out with a big sweeping curve ball, but put it in the dirt a foot in front of the plate.Eve hustled to first and the catcher was still tracking down the ball. It had rolled behind the umpire's heel and he didn't see it. Eve was half way to second when he found it. He didn't even bother to try and throw her out.Kelly was up next and was crowding the plate. Rusty decided to push him back and clipped him."Oh, man! I'm so sorry!"Both teams had been warned before the game that we would be kicked out of the tournament if we started throwing at each other. The umpire went straight to the mound after gesturing for their coach."If you hit one more, you're gone. Is that clear?" Yes, sir. It was an accident, sir," Rusty told the ump."I know, son, but you have a little history to overcome. I'm giving you fair warning."Jeff was up next. He was probably our. I never realised that he had very bad breath. Also, he had huge callouses on his feet because he never wore shoes. And his general health was very bad.In fact, you could say he was a super-calloused fragile mystic cursed by halitosis.Have you heard the one about the agnostic dyslectic insomniac?He lay awake all night wondering if there was a dog or not... A man walks into a pastry shop and orders 5 pies, 3 sausage rolls and 2 cakes. As he leaves the shop he stumbles across a homeless man on the footpath who says, “I haven’t eaten for two days”, to which the man with the pastries replies; “I wish I had your willpower”!!!Jack: Just bought a hearing-aid for two dollars!Jill: What kind is it?Jack: Quarter past ten.A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.Tech support: Are you running it under windows?Customer: “No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is.
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